Saturday, May 14, 2011

Conversations with an old 'Semi' F__ Buddy

This week, I had a convo with an old 'buddy' of mine. And when I say buddy I mean a guy I fooled around with in college.

Here's a little background about us: 'M' (I won't use his real name) was a hot RA who was known for his sexual escapades with guys. I heard the rumors and thought that whomever getting it from him was lucky. A few months later, we finally met and started hanging out. He told me that he found me attractive. I was very flattered and instantly caught up in his charms. A day after our little chat, we started messing around. But here's the thing, 'M' had a girlfriend and I wasn't the only guy he was having fun with. There were 3 other guys he was seeing at the time.

I knew that, but my sad self-esteem kept me bound to him.  I believed I couldn't do any better. I mean, 'M' was ripped, sexy, very persuasive and completely selfish. Once I finally saw 'M' for what he really was, I knew I had to do something about it. So, I ended the 'relationship'.  I realized I needed to save myself and get out while I could. We remained friends afterward, but it was weird and very awkward.

Now fast forward 14 years later. "M' contacts me through Facebook. He wanted to chat and to see how I was doing. We caught up and had a good solid convo for about an hour. Near the end of our talk, 'M' tells me he is sorry for being a douchebag all those years ago. He said that his ego got the best of him and he didn't see the harm he was doing to all of us.

I told not to beat himself up over it. We were in our early 20s; I don't think we understood what was going on with our sexuality or anything thing else at the during those days. However, it was nice to hear from him. I never thought that he would call up one day to say "Sorry I was a bastard to you"; but he did, and I was grateful for that.




Oh,  the 'Semi' in the title means, not having the complete sexual experience. We did mutual masturbation and did some oral, but that was it.

I didn't want to go all the way with someone I didn't love. I was foolish, but still a gentleman.

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